I’ve been struggling lately. I’m in my 30s, I have two little toddlers, a house I live in with them and their dad, a cat, a wonderful teaching job, part-time at a university…. But something still feels off.
It’s as if I am unsure what I should be doing with my life. I have been so used to the idea that I am a teacher, and I love history (which is my major and what I teach). But in doing so I shut out so many other parts of my “self”. I also love to READ, and I love FICTION, I love to WRITE, and I love to TALK, I love to ANALYZE, I love to CREATE ART… I hate that I boxed myself in, into one tiny little cubicle for SO long.
This is why I’m starting this. It is also a reason for why it’s anonymous. I don’t want to gain attention here for myself. I want to find a community of people who agree. One thing you will never find here is AI generated art (I hate that slop, its so overstimulating that anytime I see it anywhere I look away). Another thing you won’t find here is any “advice” or “guidance”. I will also NEVER sell you products here. That’s not my purpose. My purpose is to kinda… find myself. Without giving away too much about who I am, I let you know I’m a real person, I will put my thoughts here, and maybe you guys can help me figure out my next move as you get to know me.
Right now I’m questioning my career choice, and what my next step should be – should I stay in academia as an instructor (part-time). Should I pursue a PhD in either History or Education (it would also be part-time since I can’t travel, and online degrees aren’t as valued as in-person, but I can’t travel far from my kids lives and schools or my husband’s job). OR should I forsake this whole career and become a content creator? Online course instructor (like on Udemy or something), or write my novel (I have a few ideas, but never fully completed a novel… I did once, but I lost half the chapters over time)?
I feel so lost because I want a lot of things, and I’m interested in a lot of things, but there are many constraints keeping me as I am, feeling stuck – time and money. I have a lot of ideas about those as well, but for now let’s keep it to this issue, what is my next step? What should it be? Why?
And if any of you have been in a similar position, what allowed you to get out of it? How did you overcome? What step did you take? What did you wish someone would have told you? What advice would you give?
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